Of all the money that e'er I had,
I spent it in good company.
And all the harm I've ever done,
alas it was to none but me.
And all I've done for want of wit
to mem'ry now I can't recall;
So fill to me the parting glass,
Good night and joy be to you all.

Oh man its kinda rough writing this, and I dont want to sound like a little bitch about it, but I feel like its time.

I just can't take it anymore, the grief, the feeling of disgust, the feeling that when you come to realize the piece of shit that you are for being a degenerate gambler. 

I cant tell you how much money I have had and lost over the years.  The sick nights sleeping in a parking lot in Vegas.  Blowing all your money a week before rent is due.  In all honesty, I have lost well over two million in the last 5 years, and prob 5 million in my life time.  I have come to realize that money means absolutely nothing to me, and it dosn't make me happy at all.

More than anything, more than the money, I have put myself in serious jeporady on numerous occasions.  Gambling has lost me friends, family, and the beautiful head of hair I once had.  ITs amazing how bad my body is, how bad my head hurts, the fucking anxiety, the near heart attacks from stress.  I just cant do it anymore.  Ive tried quitting numerous times before, I have tried everything under the sun.  So I ask you my friends, support me in the decision, as I have supported you.

So i just want to say how great it was finding all the friends I have made on the site.  I wish you nothing but the best.  Just now its time to find myself. 

As always Im here if anyone wants to talk, or needs help.  Special thanks to 1rare1, who has helped me out of a jam or two on occasion.